But he changed me; I'm his ghost since he came around

Benjyyyy sent me a nice song last night. Sophia by Nerina Pallot. I'm totally in love with Ne-Yo's "Sexy Love" and "So Sick" as well. (speak of the devil benjy just signed in on msn)

Feeling very lethargic. Don't know why dance was so tiring today. But somehow I didnt feel like I danced as well as I could, felt very tense. My popping is improving though. Anyway, we're performing for Dance Week end April early May, so come support your friends in street! BW06, that means you x3 cos' there's me syaz and seleena. Street concert at DXO in May, come support it's for a good cause! Proceeds are going to charity. We're just part of it, lots of other guest performers it's gonna be damn cool.

Thinking about it, it's quite true. I don't know who is the one I can always, always turn to when i need someone in school, no matter for how small a matter. I don't want to stress Wynne out any further even though I know she'll always be willing to be there for me no matter what, Christine's like disappeared, So has Zishan, and Angel's drifting away to her new group. And I do feel they're quite exclusive. I've always had no problems just hanging around with anybody, but somehow I don't quite feel like I can just hang around her group. It's not a nice feeling, but I don't fully get why I'm feeling this way. It's not like they aren't nice people, they are, really. They're like super nice and damn fun to be around, and it's not like I don't want to really be friends with them, but still. Oh well.

Weirdly, felt this really strong pang of hurt when I read that short passage from Hweeleong's blog. I guess I'm still not really over everything, still trying to deal with the betrayal. I guess you could say I'm stupid and all, but what you see and what I do are two totally different realms. Is it useless to hope, worthless to remember? I don't know, myself.